Wise Teacher, Wise Student: Tibetan Approaches to a Healthy Relationship

By Alexander Berzin
Snow Lion Publications

Wise Teacher, Wise Student by Alexander Berzin explores the intricate and complex relationship between Western students and Eastern teachers. This particular type of relationship has its own unique set of challenges due to language barriers, cultural divides, and occasionally conflicting expectations. Berzin focuses on bridging the gap between the two worlds by exploring the student-teacher relationship through the Tibetan Buddhist outlook and its implications for Western students.

The text explores the basics of Tibetan Buddhism, including what a typical spiritual seeker in traditional Tibet would look like. I appreciated that Berzin provided information about the influence on Chinese occupation of Tibet as a means of bringing Tibetan Buddhism to the West. While this occupation is indeed tragic, it has provided the vehicle for Western students to learn about and participate in spiritual rituals and practice. I found this to be an important piece of information for understanding why this particular type of relationship needed special exploration in the first place. According to Berzin, Western spiritual seekers are very different from their Eastern counterparts. Tibetan seekers usually start their spiritual journey and education at a very young age, while most Western students begin their study as adults, after receiving a formal education, and expecting equality and full knowledge of each and every step of the spiritual journey.

After exploring these differences, Berzin touched on foundational concepts and ideas such as the Four Noble Truths and the Eight Fold Path, rectified terms, including the differences and misconceptions surrounding the terms guru and lama; and laid out basic requirements for a seeker and teacher. While this was only the first of three sections of the book, this one definitely feel the heaviest and most time consuming due to the sheer volume of information it contained. The other two sections explored the dynamics of a healthy relationship with a spiritual teacher, and unhealthy relationship behaviors such as fear, overdependence, and even rebellion. These two I found much more interesting, although somewhat dry.

The section that struck me most was on the importance of establishing a relationship based on respect. Part of establishing a healthy relationship with a mentor is focusing on that mentor’s good qualities and strengths. This is not to say that the student should ignore the bad qualities or shortcomings of their mentor, but that they should mediate and focus their energy on the positive attributes. By dwelling on the negative aspects and things one doesn’t like about their teacher, a student can potentially miss out on the lessons and parts that are positive. I found this to be a great overall piece of advice for engaging in any sort of relationship, be it with a spiritual teacher, a friend, family member, or partner. Many times relationships, of any kind, can be trying and difficult, but if you can focus on the things you appreciate about the person, you’ll be much more willing or in a place to engage in a respectful and healthy manner. Any relationship based on respect, on behalf of both parties engaged, has the greatest chance at being healthy and fruitful for all involved.

On a whole, I found the book to be very overwhelming. There was a lot of important information packed into relatively small sections. At times, it assumed the reader had a slightly greater than basic understanding of Buddhist concepts and practices, but at others, found space to break down actual terms into digestible nuggets of information. Due to this strange assumption about the knowledge base of the reader, I had a difficult time figuring out who the target audience for such a book would be. While I understand the desire to appeal to and be useful to a wider audience, I found it difficult to navigate some of the information. I found it most appropriate for a class at a Dharma center, or an intermediate course on Buddhism.

Review by Liz Martin

The Power and the Pain: Transforming Spiritual Hardship into Joy

By Andrew Holecek
Snow Lion Publications

In The Power and the Pain, Andrew Holecek divides chapters of his teachings by the Three Turnings, or teachings, of the dharma, and associates different cycles of suffering with each. Applying Buddhist principles to different hardships and difficulties along the Buddhist Path, he writes to help those cope with obstacles we stumble upon while moving forward.

In “Hardship as Loss of the Feminine” Holecek explains the concepts of masculine and feminine principles in relation to suffering. In Buddhist cosmology, Holecek writes, ladies come first. I took this chapter with the understanding that Holecek writes on Tibetan Buddhist ideologies being transmitted through Western society, and any critique would require an analysis that takes this into consideration.

Holecek uses terminology that is specific to Buddhism, but it is definitely not only for Buddhists. The Three Turnings are presented as a template for hardships that arise on a spiritual path. Holecek makes the point early on that one might enter the path unconsciously, and what I got from that was the idea that these practices would be beneficial for healing the heart and spirit, even if one doesn’t necessarily believe they are on a spiritual path.

Life is never as tidy as going from Point A to Point B to Point C, and it was possible to read select chapters and not feel you were missing anything. I received The Power and the Pain during a most spiritually tiring time in my life. I was going back to school after a five year hiatus, and the kids were on their summer break (and this meant childcare issues, or lack thereof). These challenges were coupled with serious transitions happening at work. Being a non-linear reader, I randomly opened the book to start reading and found this: “If you are wondering where you should go on your path, look into those areas that scare you and you will find your next step.” That seemed pretty right on.

Even though I am not a practicing Buddhist, I found that The Power and the Pain spoke to me as a guide, and I often went back to passages that connected how outside pressures and events can affect one’s spirit, which made the connection click.

Review by Noemi Martinez

Heartfelt Advice

By Lama Dudjom Dorjee
Snow Lion Publications

Heartfelt Advice is a record of ninety-five conversations between the Lama Dudjom Dorjee and his student Aaron Price. In each section, a small portion of a Tibetan text was read to Mr. Price, who then recorded both the translation and the explanation. The result is not the typical recitation of concepts one finds in most introductory writings on Buddhism. Instead, the concepts are explained via the personal experiences of Lama Dudjom Dorjee, and have a more intimate tone than only the translations would provide.

I am a sucker for books on Buddhism. I have a full shelf of books on the subject, and I find myself in the section nearly every time I visit the bookstore. I am enticed by the serene faces of the smiling monks on the covers, and the words of the sutras seem calming even if I sometimes don't understand them.

Unfortunately, I don’t think I’ve gotten past the second chapter of any of the books I’ve purchased. Usually by that point, I find myself overwhelmed, depressed, and feeling more than a little guilty. The initial chapters are always confusing, full of indecipherable imagery and vocabulary. Very early on, it begins to appear that the path to peace and enlightenment requires superhuman devotion; you must utter no bad words, think no bad thoughts, and perform no bad actions. You must accept that nothing is permanent and give up all attachment; to your life, loved ones, ideals, even the very idea of yourself as an individual. This is where I get depressed, feeling that I am just not up to the task of being that devoted. I begin to feel guilty when I contemplate that millions of people worldwide practice this religion and live by its teachings, and I can’t even manage to stop swearing.

This book is somewhat easier to handle. The conversational feeling of the sections allows you to absorb the concept at hand without having to fight so hard to understand it. That is not to say that this book sugarcoats any of the concepts; there is plenty of what Westerners term “hellfire and damnation," especially in the sections on the wheel of karma. The puzzling vocabulary is still present, but this book has the extremely helpful addition of a glossary. The book's format is also helpful, as it doesn’t require you to read the chapters in order: each section deals with a different topic, so flipping through the book is allowed, and may actually even be encouraged.

If you are anything like me, and approach Buddhism with as much attraction as apprehension, this book might just be the stepping stone for you. It shows that yes, studying Buddhism is a lifetime commitment, but it makes it seem a little less daunting than usual.

Review by Melissa Ruiz