Mallory Square is full of professional street performers who've honed their crafts over the decades. There's a tightrope walker, fire juggler, a modern-day houdini, hypnotist, and one all-around skills guy who does a little bit of everything while his dog collects tips from the crowd. Big bucks are made at Mallory Square every night, and the best spots for performing are doled out by lottery each night according to a system that's closely watched by a governing board of performers. Permits are required, and the entire sunset scene is very closely monitored for un-licenced performers, etc.
If you're not signed up for a Key West sunset cruise that night, hanging around in Mallory Square at dusk is a good way to start your evening.
So I was puzzled during a recent visit to the Sunset Celebration at Mallory Square when I came across the worst Silver Girl ever. There's a Silver Man there, and he's pretty good. If you give him a dollar he'll whistle and pretend to fix his bike with a wrench, robot-style. Next to him is Silver Girl, painted up in wings and a long fancy dress. Give her a dollar and not much really happens at all.
She wanly kisses her finger tips, first left and then right, then completes the lamest, most passionless curtsy ever. I don't even know how you can perform physical movement and be so limp at the same time. The whole thing takes maybe five seconds and after she's done, you stand there not even believing that was her whole schtick and would it be wrong to take back your dollar.
